My Scribble Pad

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

Cleaning the Clutter in Life

So after decades I finally cleaned my wallet. This is one thing which I never clean cause I always have this feeling that all the knick knacks I shove in it might come handy some time or the other and yeah it has been so sometimes but rarely.


So what did I find in my wallet? Well first a huge bundle of ATM slips dating back to my grandfather's time. Ok I am exaggerating it a bit too much but realistically I had ATM slips dating back to Jan 05 ...... Jan 05 ?? What the heck is it gona be of any help to me ????


Well moving on, I found a bill for the shoe I purchased back in February this year.... (what was I thinking that the shoe had a 1 year warranty?). then some bus tickets (just incase if I had a change in profession and became a bus conductor) , food bazaar bills (I don't even know what was I thinking at the time I decided to save it, probably I was thinking of creating a fossil out of it ) , food coupons which have expired (don't ask me) etc etc....

Why I am I holding on these things ???? Surely there is no emotional attachment to any these stuff. It makes me wonder how difficult it is to let go off things we have accumulated over the years and find it impossible to dispose it off.

For example when I went to visit my grandmother last after 11 long years I saw a rag cloth which was a curtain when I last visited her 11 years back. I was glad that the piece of cloth was demoted from a curtains status to a rag piece.


My mom has treasured one of my dolls - those which used to open and closed its eyes, and also cry and laugh. The state of the doll is beyond my explanation - its stuffing has lost its fluff and most of the stuffing is not even there, so the doll just has a layer of a piece of cloth to be called its body. Some how its looks like the evil sister of Chunky the evil doll in "Childs play".


I used to collect all types of cards - b'day, xmas, valentines day, friendships day, than friendship bands, glittered stickers with those messages like "I miss U" and stuff, pens ( I am still crazy abt stationery), fancy note pads and many other stuff when I was in school and a bit of junior college too. But finally I got over the habit as I was pursuing a life of vagabond for sometime.

(I know u must be thinking that this is hereditary)

Although I have learned to discard materialistic clutter I am yet to learn to discard the emotional clutter. Its a very difficult task which I am trying to learn as best as I can because I feel its human tendency to carry emotional baggage every time and every where.
But the point is why is it so hard to let of the baggage especially when it is gona make one feel better and live better ??? I guess humans are programmed this way.

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